Sunday, February 13, 2011

Here's lookin at you, kid

I recorded a cover of the song "here's lookin at you, kid" while I was sound checking. It's a straight through, live, one off track. I'm never gonna release it, and that my friends, proves that I am a better person than those people on youtube.

I might play it live though, which is a completely different bad idea alltogether.

-STEVE HOLT!

Saturday, February 12, 2011

This one's by the gaslight anthem!

Dudes and dudettes, there are literally 8 million acoustic gaslight anthem covers on youtube. It's out of hand! Anyone with a guitar and undeservedly high self esteem jumps in front of their webcam and starts playing something.

The problem (besides the obvious) is that no matter how well you play guitar, or how well you sing, you can never perfectly mimic Brian Fallon. Regardless of the emotion you may feel from a gaslight song, it's still a second hand experience, and it will show no matter what you do.

This goes for all covers, but covering a gaslight song is like covering "layla". Or something. I don't know. Who am I to tell these people NOT to do that? I mean, on one hand it is really cool to see people taking a stab at it, but on the other hand I wanna break out the squirt bottle on them.

There is a profound lack of full band covers of tga songs. That's because in any band of 4 or more people, you're gonna have one dude who's like "no."

And you're gonna have a minimum of 3 people who can't play it correctly. Fuck, even CLOSE to correct! The 59' sound is my alltime favorite song, and it literally kills me a little everytime I hear someone butchering it.

Look, I play more gaslight than my own songs...at home. Or in practice. Or whatever, just not on a fucking webcam. If you were doing that on chat roulette, and the only other option was braving the sea of dicks which seem to be whipped out 24/7, Id dive into that ocean in a heartbeat.

Actually, I wouldn't go to chat roulette, cause its all dude's weiners, and at very best you might see an acoustic gaslight cover. By someone not wearing any clothes.

-Kevin

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

I wish I knew a dentist

Man, the broken tooth they repaired about 2 months ago started hurting today. They said either the nerve would heal itself, or it would die and I would have to have full on surgery to keep the infection from killing me.

Anyways, its been approximately the amount of time they said it would be before I saw some sort of indication of nerve death or complete regeneration.

I'm not sure if the pain is because the nerve has healed and there's something wrong with the tooth, or because toxins are slowly being released. You can totally die from that.

I'm pretty confident that I'm gonna die on a Monday, so its probably just a minor inconvenience with a major price tag. That's how all my illnesses are. Its always "good thing we caught it early, here's a bill for more than you've ever made in your life."

I don't pay medical bills. I'm hoping when china takes over they clean the slate, otherwise I'm going to canada.

-Kevin

Monday, February 7, 2011

Hahahahha!

So here's a little backstory before you hear what just happened to me.

Last night, the phrase that paid was "go packers!" Team spirit had nothing to do with it. You see, we were lighting off some very illegal fireworks, and when someone saw us (because I was doing it in the middle of a fairly busy street), we would yell "go packers!", and the people would conveniently forget about calling the cops. It worked like a swiss watch, hence me writing this from walgreens instead of bitching about it in jail.

Anyways, one of the pharmacists was talking to the others about these crazy guys lighting fireworks and yelling go packers last night. I'm not 100% sure she was talking about us, but she got really quiet when she saw me.

The moral of this story? Go Packers!

(Go anything that gets me out of a ticket!)

-Kevin

Sunday, February 6, 2011

We won the superbowl, what are we gonna do next? Read on!

Our next order of business in this fine city of Milwaukee is to fix our local economy and clean up our dirty ass streets!

Wait, I confused that with "spend a lot of the city budget on packers memorabilia". Can someone explain that mass produced bootlegged football memorabilia is simply salvation army fodder come summer? No? Oh well, looks like we're gonna get some "rogers" jerseys.

The good news is tj maxx buys our misprint bootleg shit, albeit at half our cost, ever since the city's "farva" mishap in '97. I don't know what everyone's complaining about, just grow a mustache and carry a liter of cola with you.

People will applaud your excellence.

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

The ghost

So the haunted apartment we're renting just got a little weird.

I couldn't find my pants for days, and it was bugging me. I mean, I have lots of other pants, but those ones had my belt and wallet on/in them, and I need those.

So anyways, the first place I looked (and the first place shelica looked too) was on my side of the bed. After that we moved to the walk in closet, and so forth. I checked the whole house 3 times, and even checked the balcony outside.

You know where we found them 4 days later? My side of the bed. I don't care if the ghost is gonna use my shit, he just needs to put it back quicker.

Back to the grindstone

Man, I've had a long week. We'll skip the deets, but it resulted in 3 to 4 days of bed rest. I slept for like 48 hours straight, and then hung out in bed for two more days.

Whoops.

It worked out really well though, my boss called me on Monday and told me I had Tuesday and Wednesday off. Tomorrow I get my ritalin refilled, and that shit makes me feel like a million bucks. I'm not sure how I always get lucky, but I do. I love my life once a month, and tomorrow is looking to be that day.

Keep it real, and check out "parks and recreation" on nbc. Its like the office, but aziz ansari is in it. Rock out, boys and girls!