Full circle

I'm (re)starting college this month. I'm signed up for a music appreciation class. I actually took (and failed) a very similar class in 8th grade. The teacher was a bitch, and after "the breaking point" she sat me down and said "music just isn't your thing".

The breaking point I referred to was the moment my life began.
It was another average day, filled with her bullshit "I'm hungover because I'm an 'artist' " lesson plan. I, as usual, didn't give a shit what she thought of music (and when I wasn't 'resting my eyes' I was gladly obliging her with verbal confirmation of that feeling).

Anyways, she loved pop quizzes, where you had to identify the different parts of the song (verse, chorus, etc), and I was damn near asleep as she cued the needle to a track i'd never heard. It was the album version of The Beatle's "Let it be". I couldn't care less.

About 2 minutes into it, the organ part kicks in, and I assume with passing interest that the song is ending. In a moment that lasted both an eternity and a nanosecond, I heard George Harrison kick that (rather pussy, otherwise) song into a gear that I didn't know was even possible.

I was absolutely transfixed, for the first and last time of my middle school career. My "quiz" answer sheet looked rougly like this:

1. Not the solo
2.THE SOLO!
3. Not the solo

As she was giving me the awkward teacher-student-breakup-getthefuckout lecture, I made sure NOT to let her know that for once in her teaching career, she actually facilitated an appreciation for music.

You can hear the song (the good version, not the pussy radio version) at the link below. P.s. it has the worst 'video' ever, but you're not going to be listening with your eyes.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kEogJacjLTE&feature=related

boondock saints 3

I really can't stress how much I'm looking forward to the new saints movie. If Troy Duffy makes a formal announcement about it this year, I will get a boondock saints tattoo. Straight up. The DAY he makes the announcement, I'll be in the chair. That's a promise.

"Taking Back Sunay" in review

Let's clear something up. This record is not called "Tell all your friends" and it doesn't have a song called "Cute Without The E (Cut from the team). If you want that in a Taking Back Sunday album, then they have one that matches that exact description. Go listen to it.

The opening track "El Paso" caught a lot of flack when it debuted, that's no secret. The real secret, the key to listening to this album if you will, is to disambiguate that song from the rest of the record. View it as an audio "parental advisory" of sorts. A mission statement.

Viewing it this way, "Faith (when I let you down)" is the first stop in our trip down memory lane. If you don't get a little bit of a "Make Damn Sure" vibe, then your ears are broken.

"Best Places To Be A Mom" sounds like it could have been a B-Side from the afforementioned "Tell All Your Friends" album. I wonder why that is.

"Sad Savior" opens with a riff deeply reminiscant of the Gaslight Anthem, and instantly grows into something a lot less familiar. Adam and John really hit their vocal stride in this song.

"Who are you anyway" and "Money (let it go)" both give somewhat of a New vibe. They're both great.

"This is all now" has a bit of a sound of controlled experimentation. You can really hear a bit of John's Straylight Run influence shining through.

"It doesn't feel a thing like falling" sounds absolutely huge. It also has a little bit of a Jimmy Eat World feel to it.

"Since you're Gone" mixes Adam's signature screams of utter helplessness with...The Beatles. Seriously. It's pretty damn sick!

"You got me" turns it back around with another fast tune, kinda like "Money", but definitely not ripping it off.

"Call Me In The Morning" has that sort of...ending sound. It works out well, cause it's the last song.

In all, this half assed review doesn't get the message across the same way LISTENING to the album does.

The message? After 9 years and a nightmare involving a Fred other than Krueger, we finally got the follow up to Tell All Your Friends.

Mormons do it for the kids

The thought of children terrifies me. Not just in a "children of the corn" way, but in the "never ending constantly needing something from me" way.

I truly feel fortunate to NOT have any kids, but not for my own selfish reasons. The thing is, I'm not sure I could take care of a child. I'm not certain I could keep the kid from dying, let alone assist in the creation of a happy childhood.

You know how you act a little different when you're communicating on facebook or twitter? Or when your friend is filming you?

Well, I don't.

This is my personality, and I consistantly bare it all. In fact, instead of "acting up", I'm constantly "toning it down". It's a terrible reality, but I will never fake it to fit in.

That's it. That's my speech.

the news is there, you just gotta open your eyes

Man, lots of crazy/awesome music news these past few days! Hot Water Music is in the studio recording a new album! Their last album (of new music) was 2005's "The new what next".

That was arguably their best record of all time, which instantly makes it one of the top 5 most awesome records ever. I'm only working with the facts here, people.

Also, Brian Fallon's side project "the horrible crowes" has been in the studio recording their (currently unnamed) debut album, which is gonna be a full length.

Brian posted a photo of himself playing the piano, and it's the same piano that Meatloaf used on his "bat out of hell" album, so fully expect Meatloaf sized sales figures from this record. Or full on Tom Wait's style awesomeness. One of those expectations should become realised.

Someone just pulled a fire alarm in an adjacent building, and it wasn't me. FML, the cops are gonna harass me over this one.

Butterfingers

Damn, I was craving a butterfinger, so I walked over to our candy aisle (I'm at work). Some dick BROKE all of them. Like, crushed the shit out of them.

In an act of asshole collaboration, I left them there. I think it was a pretty innovative prank, and I'm nothing if not appreciative of such fine (albeit minimalist) art.

C-c-c-Combo!

I'm about to leave to pick up Mike M and see Chuck Ragan open for Social Distortion in a bit. I used to really care about what I wore to such events, but now, I am sitting in some fuckin basketball shorts with an old "The Sleeping" shirt on. I'll change the shorts (to dirty blue jeans), but that's about it.

Interesting story, I was arrested in this shirt once. In fact, it's so interesting that I won't tell the story. I'm just gonna reiterate the fact that they should NOT sell liter bottles of that 99bananas (or other fruits), and it should NOT be like $6.99.

Seriously, that shit is strong.

Oh yeah, I cut my hair today, and it's the best haircut I've ever had. I seriously looked at it in awe for like 10 mins throughout the day! I mean, it's still only like $6 day at supercuts good, but I did it myself, which is sweet.

P.S. for the record, I realised that over half of the haircuts I've gotten in life I gave myself. 10 years, and I'm only "$6 day at supercuts" good. Wtf.

Its been a while

I haven't posted anything on here in a long time, but I've been sorta busy behind the scenes, going through possible new band members. The main thing is that they need to be cool with me not drinking. Well, the main thing is they need to be good. And I think we got it covered.

I've gone like 5 months almost without drinking, and it's... it's a fucking doozy. I still don't feel like I was ever a full on alcoholic, I just think my anarchaic self destructive nature likes to poke it's head in while I'm drunk.

I laugh to myself a lot, and the crazy things I think of and shrug off when I'm sober turn into drunk/disorderly tickets when I'm drunk. I've met a LOT of alcoholics in my day, and I've also met an equal amount of people who will tell you you're an alcoholic.

It usually creates a gain for them, either monetarily or egotistically (usually both), and they can take their "wisdom" and shove it up their asses (unless you're a serious alcoholic, in which case heed their advice).

The point I'm trying to convey is this... you can't quit drugs or alcohol or cigarettes, or coffee (even any occasional use of them) for anyone but yourself. You have to want to change, and NOTHING in the world can force you to want that. It is literally the epitome of egotism that drives the addiction, the constant thought that you know better than they do.

And guess what boys and girls, you do know better than they do. You've got an x-ray machine and they've got a flashlight and a light brite.

Just keep in mind that, in a dark room, your best bet of finding your way out is by using the flashlight (or bulky and obtuse metaphorical light brite).

The new band starts now

Well, I just pulled the trigger on a new drummer. I'm pretty psyched, and it's gonna be a lot different than anything I've ever played before. We're both psyched on getting things moving forward and starting to play shows and record. Rob (DeAngelis, the new drummer) has a recording studio and has recorded a lot in the past, which is sweet. Unlike me, though, he has the dedication and attention span to RELEASE them, which should be great.

I've never gotten past pressing one copy of a cd, and doing so scares me. I've always felt that if it isn't on a record it's not finished, and I can still tweak it and re-record it forever and ever and ever. Hopefully we'll get some sweet demos out shortly.

The only songs I KNOW I want to carry over to this band are "Miles Away", "shock and awe", and maybe "not for me". I've written one new one already (tentatively called "Vault 101") to bring to the table. If everyone was half as excited about Vault 101 as I am, 90% of the world would die of a stroke. The other 10% would roll their eyes at my nerdy video game references sneaking their way into song titles.

"Vault 101. It was here you were born...it is here you will die."

Oops

I realized just now that there's been a few...er...mistakes. look, you know how you get really bored during conversations? Exactly. Well, you know how you say more and more outrageous things until people realize you're joking? Right. Well, I just realized that some conversations have ended before the other party(s) deduced that I was pulling their leg.

I also realize that making jokes about ben weasel hitting girls on facebook might leave a sour taste in the mouth of someone who still thinks I hit my girlfriend and beat my dog as a hobby.

It's a little late for me to be like "I was kidding", but it's never too late for me to push the joke beyond the bounds of good taste. =)

Do it!

Lots and lots of shitty news lately. Rumor has it I don't deal with death so well, so we'll move on.

Here's some news style headlines from my life.

-pretty sure my maintainence man is either a pimp or he hunts humans. I decided I shouldn't fuck with him (to his face) anymore.

-there's never been a point in my life where id choose alcohol over chocolate milk

-we reached a point as a nation where it was okay to make jokes about hiroshima, but now a possible nuclear fiasco in japan is suddenly off limits.

-I'm one ep (senor and the queen) away from having the gaslight anthem's entire library on vinyl.

-the chicago code is a pretty sweet show

-house is still the best drama on tv. It always is, until dexter comes on. Then its a tie. it's always sunny in philadelphia is the best comedy.

I'm done. I'm gonna play my guitar till it's time to go to work.

The bird's eye view of a cigarette garden

Man, I thought the cigarette butts I threw off my balcony would just...I don't know...disappear. they didn't, and there is hundreds of them scattered across a 10 foot by 10 foot section of grass. My neighbors understandably called the apartment manager and bitched.

Actually a real man (or at least less of a douche) would have came upstairs and said something to me, but barbed wire and tribal tattoos are surprisingly misleading.

Anyways, I'm super happy that the gaslight anthem is safe and sound in Tokyo right now. The future of rock n roll was precariously close to being doomed this week.

I really use this as a forum for reminding myself of events in my past worth writing about, and find it amusing that anyone in the world has even read this (let alone laughed along with me). I am constantly posting inside jokes that only I will laugh at, with crazy raging opinions sprinkled in for good measure.

I mean, you could use this time for a lot worse than reading up on my pseudoinsanity, but you could spend it a lot better. Benny Horowitz has a pretty great blog (that I unfortunately, relate to a little too well). Check it out at http://www.ohlookhoworiginal.blogspot.com/

Of course you've got the man himself's blog over at www.cassettesinthemailbox.blogspot.com

Yeah, I just promoted a much more popular set of blogs at a not popular blog, but if you're reading this you're probably dying for something interesting to cleanse your pallette of my bullshit.

-Kevin

I feel old

Man, I've been having all sorts of old people pains. I keep telling myself its only in my head, but it appears my head is in my back now. Fuckin weak.

Something I can't understand

It's been a while since I've posted something on here, but I'm sure no one is crying over it. Lately, I've been listening to Circa Survive. On repeat. From the time I wake up till the time I go to sleep.

Shelica asked me a minute ago why I'm so obsessed with them now, and it got me thinking that I really didn't know why, it just happened. So anyways, I've been thinking and here's what I came up with.

Every once in a while (a great while) I come upon a band or an album that I just can't understand. I mean, I can understand it in the traditional sense that it's 10-12 songs that you listen to and then it's over... but I can't really UNDERSTAND it.

The last time it happened was with Gaslight's American Slang album. I had heard their previous records, but my brain couldn't process the leap from the 59' sound to American Slang. It was a progression that was so illogical that it became the only logical point of succession.

It's happened a handful of times in the past, where I just hear something that I can't fathom. Taking Back Sunday's Tell All Your Friends album was one of those moments, where you hear it and just think to yourself "Did these kids really just do that?"

The "problem" for me is that once I've wrapped my head around it, I want to know exactly HOW they did it. I want to understand it further.

You can't tell me "The Ugly Organ" didn't blow your head off the first time you heard it. I didn't know what the hell was going on for like a week after hearing A Gentleman Caller.

Good records make you smile and sing along, but truly great records disorient you. They take everything you thought you knew about music and invalidate it.

And that, my friend, is the story of Charlie Sheen's addiction to #winning

Blue Sky Noise and the truth about Bowser

I'm quickly realizing that Circa Survive is the band music critics (and even people who matter) expect to hear when they pop in a new radiohead album. I HEARD their newest album "blue sky noise" when it first came out, but I didn't actually LISTEN to it until recently.

I feel like I had a $100 bill tucked away in my wallet but I didn't find it til now. Let's face facts here. (By facts, I clearly mean my opinion) "strange terrain" is just about the best way to open an album. I get the same feeling listening to the album starting as I do when I hear the beginning of "Floorbound" (The opener from Punch Drunk's 2004 album "pure unadulterated hate is the best medicine").

Its the feeling that there's a freight train barrelling down on you. There's nothing you can do to stop it. There's nothing that could make you WANT to stop it. It's that feeling of curiosity combined with adrenaline that silently urges you to keep your eyes open. To watch the train connect with your body.

Basically, if you haven't felt this feeling from music before, you're buying the dust jacket and ignoring the book it was meant to protect. You're getting cliff notes when you wanted the unabridged version.

Here's the point I'm trying to make:

There are literally zero radiohead album reviews that describe the sensation I'm flailing to convey. Check out blue sky noise, but also check out anything else you can get your hands on until you've experienced this feeling. I gotta warn you though, once you've felt it you can't unfeel it.

Also, I'm working on writing a short cartoon or comic about the truth behind Bowser "kidnapping" the princess all the time. It will NOT be G Rated, but it will NOT play off that tired notion that Bowser wants to get in her pants.

He's some sort of reptile, and he clearly exhibits his lack of genitalia. I can't believe the numerous discussions online where this glaring fact is miraculously overlooked.

-Kevin

Recording

So I read an article online that really psyched me up to record. I don't know why, but whatever.

So here's the plan, I'm about 25% done with an acoustic demo ep, and when I'm done with that I'll re-record it with all the instruments. It'll all be available online for free, and it'll hopefully turn out pretty sweet.

-Kevin

Here's lookin at you, kid

I recorded a cover of the song "here's lookin at you, kid" while I was sound checking. It's a straight through, live, one off track. I'm never gonna release it, and that my friends, proves that I am a better person than those people on youtube.

I might play it live though, which is a completely different bad idea alltogether.

-STEVE HOLT!

This one's by the gaslight anthem!

Dudes and dudettes, there are literally 8 million acoustic gaslight anthem covers on youtube. It's out of hand! Anyone with a guitar and undeservedly high self esteem jumps in front of their webcam and starts playing something.

The problem (besides the obvious) is that no matter how well you play guitar, or how well you sing, you can never perfectly mimic Brian Fallon. Regardless of the emotion you may feel from a gaslight song, it's still a second hand experience, and it will show no matter what you do.

This goes for all covers, but covering a gaslight song is like covering "layla". Or something. I don't know. Who am I to tell these people NOT to do that? I mean, on one hand it is really cool to see people taking a stab at it, but on the other hand I wanna break out the squirt bottle on them.

There is a profound lack of full band covers of tga songs. That's because in any band of 4 or more people, you're gonna have one dude who's like "no."

And you're gonna have a minimum of 3 people who can't play it correctly. Fuck, even CLOSE to correct! The 59' sound is my alltime favorite song, and it literally kills me a little everytime I hear someone butchering it.

Look, I play more gaslight than my own songs...at home. Or in practice. Or whatever, just not on a fucking webcam. If you were doing that on chat roulette, and the only other option was braving the sea of dicks which seem to be whipped out 24/7, Id dive into that ocean in a heartbeat.

Actually, I wouldn't go to chat roulette, cause its all dude's weiners, and at very best you might see an acoustic gaslight cover. By someone not wearing any clothes.

-Kevin

I wish I knew a dentist

Man, the broken tooth they repaired about 2 months ago started hurting today. They said either the nerve would heal itself, or it would die and I would have to have full on surgery to keep the infection from killing me.

Anyways, its been approximately the amount of time they said it would be before I saw some sort of indication of nerve death or complete regeneration.

I'm not sure if the pain is because the nerve has healed and there's something wrong with the tooth, or because toxins are slowly being released. You can totally die from that.

I'm pretty confident that I'm gonna die on a Monday, so its probably just a minor inconvenience with a major price tag. That's how all my illnesses are. Its always "good thing we caught it early, here's a bill for more than you've ever made in your life."

I don't pay medical bills. I'm hoping when china takes over they clean the slate, otherwise I'm going to canada.

-Kevin

Hahahahha!

So here's a little backstory before you hear what just happened to me.

Last night, the phrase that paid was "go packers!" Team spirit had nothing to do with it. You see, we were lighting off some very illegal fireworks, and when someone saw us (because I was doing it in the middle of a fairly busy street), we would yell "go packers!", and the people would conveniently forget about calling the cops. It worked like a swiss watch, hence me writing this from walgreens instead of bitching about it in jail.

Anyways, one of the pharmacists was talking to the others about these crazy guys lighting fireworks and yelling go packers last night. I'm not 100% sure she was talking about us, but she got really quiet when she saw me.

The moral of this story? Go Packers!

(Go anything that gets me out of a ticket!)

-Kevin

We won the superbowl, what are we gonna do next? Read on!

Our next order of business in this fine city of Milwaukee is to fix our local economy and clean up our dirty ass streets!

Wait, I confused that with "spend a lot of the city budget on packers memorabilia". Can someone explain that mass produced bootlegged football memorabilia is simply salvation army fodder come summer? No? Oh well, looks like we're gonna get some "rogers" jerseys.

The good news is tj maxx buys our misprint bootleg shit, albeit at half our cost, ever since the city's "farva" mishap in '97. I don't know what everyone's complaining about, just grow a mustache and carry a liter of cola with you.

People will applaud your excellence.

The ghost

So the haunted apartment we're renting just got a little weird.

I couldn't find my pants for days, and it was bugging me. I mean, I have lots of other pants, but those ones had my belt and wallet on/in them, and I need those.

So anyways, the first place I looked (and the first place shelica looked too) was on my side of the bed. After that we moved to the walk in closet, and so forth. I checked the whole house 3 times, and even checked the balcony outside.

You know where we found them 4 days later? My side of the bed. I don't care if the ghost is gonna use my shit, he just needs to put it back quicker.

Back to the grindstone

Man, I've had a long week. We'll skip the deets, but it resulted in 3 to 4 days of bed rest. I slept for like 48 hours straight, and then hung out in bed for two more days.

Whoops.

It worked out really well though, my boss called me on Monday and told me I had Tuesday and Wednesday off. Tomorrow I get my ritalin refilled, and that shit makes me feel like a million bucks. I'm not sure how I always get lucky, but I do. I love my life once a month, and tomorrow is looking to be that day.

Keep it real, and check out "parks and recreation" on nbc. Its like the office, but aziz ansari is in it. Rock out, boys and girls!

The Boondock Saints 3: Saints Preserve Us

Nothing in the world is more important than this movie. Well, the dark tower movie maybe, but as of now, we're talking about the saints.

Troy (Duffy, the writer/director) had written 10 scripts between boondock saints 1 and it's sequel, and wanted to focus on making some other movies before returning to the boondock saints.

Now, don't get me wrong, I love the guy, but I hear he's a pain in the ass to work with. How much of a pain? Well, in a 12 year career he's made 2 movies. Hopefully he just sits down and does this new saints film, and then branches out.

I had a lot I was gonna say, but it just sounds like shit talking, so I'm out!

Better to burn out bright I guess...

If you haven't heard yet, this is a sad day for anyone who doesn't suck. After receiving yet another slew of bad reviews from people who aren't smart enough to walk a dog for a living, kevin smith officially announced he will only be directing one more movie. Ever.

It sounds like it's gonna be sick, and hopefully he pulls out all the stops and fills it with easter eggs for all the die hard fans.

On a completely unrelated note, I have a brand new song I'm itching to try out on a crowd. I don't know what to name it, but it's a pretty personal song for me. I tried to stray away from insider references and inside jokes, and not use metaphors. I'm not sure how well that worked out.

Also, its the first song I ever wrote specifically to be an acoustic song. I feel like my writing has gone in a different direction. Its not that "douchebag college kid who thinks because he owns a guitar that people want to see him play it at parties", and it's not the usual "apathetically going through the motions".

Its hard to pinpoint the genre of music I'm writing, for me at least. When you listen to it, you will (hopefully) just hear my band. You (hopefully) won't hear gaslight, millencolin, weezer, brand new, etc etc. That's the problem for me. When I hear a song I wrote, I can remember where I first heard and subsequently emulated someone elses playing style.

I'm truly not sure if anyone else hears it the way I do, but Jerry used to reassure me that I didn't rip anyone off. It's weird to not have him there for my insecurties, but that's what the song is about. It's about Jerry finally being fed up with the bullshit I've been slinging for years, and how I'm really not mad at him for it. I don't blame him!

The offensive joke I had to delete

I had to backspace and alter a joke I made on fb, and afterwards I realized that censoring yourself is worse than offending someone. (That's actually the reasoning I use for a lot of shit.)

Alright, so the setup is that vuze is going to take 12 weeks to download something that should take 3hours tops. It used to work really well, but all of a sudden it just wouldn't work, and it made my computer freeze 4 times in a row last night on startup.

"Look, vuze, its not that I don't like you. Its just that you have the work ethic of a 16 year old girl, and you make my computer slower than a jehova's witness chick."

See, its not even that offensive (or funny for that matter).

I since got utorrent, and guess how long the download took. 2 hours and 55 minutes. Fuck you, vuze, you piece of shit. Oh who am I kidding, I still love you girl.

Work, music, and whatever else you don't want to hear me go on about

Man, the best chorus I've ever heard has to be "old haunts" off the gaslight anthem's "american slang" album.

I've always been drawn to the chorus of a song more so than any other aspect, as I assume is true of 99% of all listeners. There's really no reason to have a sweet set of verses if your chorus is gonna be as bad as sheena easton's "morning train".

I've referenced "morning train" (my baby takes the morning train... etc etc) quite a lot throughout my life, and I feel I need to clear something up. That song is like feta cheese. It's by far the worst ever, but it's so bad that you have to pop your head in every once in a while to make sure it's still as bad as you remember.

The thing is, I actually developed a taste for feta now. If my musical taste ever adjusts itself to morning train, I'm gonna throw myself headfirst down a flight of stairs. If you ever see me flying down a set of stairs superman style, you know why.

Well, either that or uncle phil got pissed and threw me out.

Movies

I've been trying to remember (or understand) where my weird obsession with movies came from, and I've been largely unsuccessful. I did, however, make a mental list of my favorite movies growing up.

I'm not gonna lie, 99% of this is embarassing.

0-4 years old:
-Lady and the tramp. I've seen that shit over a thousand times, and it still captivates me. I know it shouldn't, but it's some sort of psychological thing. I can sit still and watch it without realizing I'm doing it. Weird...

-howard the duck

5-10:
-return of the jedi
- Back to the future 2
-Die hard with a vengence
-the crow
-lethal weapon 2


10-15
-Beverly hills cop 3. I'm not kidding.
-memento
-dogma
-jay and silent bob strike back

16-19:

- the matrix 1 and 2 (fuck revolutions. that movie is turrible.)
-batman begins
-mallrats
-clerks
-the big lebowski
-walk the line

20-current:
-gone baby gone
-the dark knight
-inception

I'm not listing everything, obviously, but the only trend I can see is an increase in obsession with chris nolan movies. I never would have called chris nolan as the reason I got into movies. I would have honestly thought it would have been george lucas or kevin smith. I guess it was really kevin smith. I don't know.

All I know is I haven't seen beverly hills cop 3 in a long time, and I'm psyched on that.

Wait, I play music?

In true fashion, the blog I started to keep my own memory straight as to where I currently am in the recording process has become my opinion factory.

You know where I am in the recording process? Me either. I haven't done a single fucking thing since I started this shit. I have, however, heard a LOT of new music this year. It's really been one of those experiences where you're writing and writing and writing, then you hear what someone else has written, and you don't want to even think about the songs you wrote.

For instance, the first time I heard The Gaslight Anthem's "American Slang" record, I stopped writing music for like... well, I heard it last april and this is January now.

Seriously, I'm gonna try to find the link to Gaslight's alternate version of Boxer real fast. Actually, no I'm not. If you're interested you'll search it out. Be sure you've heard the album version of "Boxer" though first. It's a 100% different song!

Speaking of the gaslight anthem, my 59' sound record skips during the title track. I'm pretty bummed about that, and it might make me take another year off from writing music.

There's something in the water down there

Man, I can't stop listening to the artificial hearts' new track "Victoria". I loved that song when it was first conceived, and they've done nothing but improve it.

Find more artists like The Artificial Hearts at Myspace Music

There's something in the water in Rockford, and if you could bottle it and sell it, you'd make a fortune.

Don't really try that though. City water tends to be filled with human feces.

Some clarification

I feel I need to clarify that I'm not heartless. The yogi video I posted is REALLY funny IF you've seen "the assassination of jesse james by the coward robert ford".

Which, by the way, is a sweet Casey Affleck/Brad Pitt movie. One of those dudes is the most under rated actor in hollywood, and the other one is Brad Pitt.

Gleetards

I hate glee, man. That show is just plain bad. Its worse than the real housewives, which should win an award for being terrible. I know we're about 18 months away from the dark tower tv show, but come on. We shouldn't have to wait for shows to stop sucking.

Speaking of good upcoming tv shows, dennis lehane (shutter island, mystic river, and gone baby gone) is writing a new show for fx. So that should be sweeter than sugar.

I'll leave you with one of the funniest videos I've seen in the past year, courtesy of funny or die. It's the alternate ending for the yogi bear movie, and it's hilarious!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=youtube_gdata_player&v=X4-2cEt0hh8

Monday

This is turning out to be one of the worst days ever. And one of the best, kinda. I start my new job today which is sweet, but I need to document the bad shit. In the past hour:

-Woke up from a dream that I had throat cancer

-sat in my favorite chair, only to find a spider on me (I have severe arachnophobia)

-Went into the bedroom to find that marshall pissed on the sheets we bought last night

-Went to smoke a cigarette to calm down, and found I only have 2 cigarettes left from the 2 cartons I recently got

There was more, but I give up. Monday, fuck you. That's my point. Fuck you, Monday. You suck.

"People" watching

Man, I talk a lot of shit about southridge. You'd think I would have even the smallest shred of respect for my home town mall, but I don't. This place is a shit hole.

I'm 99% sure this place gives its frequent customers downs syndrome. Either that or there's some sort of convention.

The man in black fled across the desert...

...and the gunslinger followed.

I just found out that Ron Howard wants the role of Roland Deschain (the dark tower series) to be played by Javier Bardem (the bad guy in no country for old men). I was immediately outraged, and was about to denounce my faith in this series working out. I was always onboard the Viggo Mortenson or Hugh Jackman (or Hugh Laurie) for Roland train.

Then I saw a picture of just Javier's face, and that was it for me. Fuck whatever I thought about his body type being wrong, or his nationality being incongruent with Roland's. Fuck it, Javier is the man for the job.

However, I'm not gonna be broken hearted if they go for their current second choice, which is Viggo Mortenson.

Can I call it or what?

They mean the world to me

Alright, I'm gonna attempt to tackle a topic that's rather near and dear to me. In the past few years, I've had an ever growing infatuation with a band from New Jersey. In this entry, I will attempt to describe the reasons behind that obsession, and by the end, if you're not a fan yet, hopefully you will have the motivation to get out from beneath the rock you call a home and check out my alltime favorite band.

I'm speaking, of course, about The Gaslight Anthem.

Now, in no particular order, here is the first reason to give these boys a chance. Brian Fallon (vocals, guitar) is the nicest guy you'll ever meet. I have never in my life heard him say anything bad about another band, which is really hard to accomplish. Before him, I thought it was impossible.

The band hangs out with the fans every night after the show. Seriously. You don't see metallica doing that.

Every song they have released is good. This is because they are great musicians, but also because they write about 45-50 songs before they go into the studio. They then take only the 10 best, and use those on the album. They throw the rest out.

It's impossible to define them into a single genre. Haters love to pidgeon hole them as "springsteen punk", but haters hate. That's all they do.

Speaking of Bruce Springsteen, he is as big of a Gaslight fan as I am. When the guy you have "ripped off" ( as the haters say) publicly becomes one of your biggest fans, it's safe to say you're doing something right.

Adam Lazzara (Taking Back Sunday) is also an outspoken advocate of the gaslight anthem. He has said he would leave taking back Sunday to join them.

Alex Rosamilia is the best lead guitar player ever. He doesn't play any guitar solos, but instead layers amazing riffs over the entirety of the songs.

Every member of the band is top notch at what they do, which is really never the case. Alex Levine is a great bass player, and Benny Horowitz makes drumming interesting.

To add to all this, they have been hailed by rolling stone magazine as the best live performing band currently playing anywhere in the world. They have spot on performances, and every time I see them they've somehow gotten better.



So there you go. If you haven't really checked them out, here's a few songs to give a try.

The 59' Sound
We Came To Dance
Say I Won't (recognize)
We Did It When We Were Young
She Loves You

The fighter

So I started watching the fighter last night, and its a sweet movie. I didn't finish it, but I saw a hilarious couple of "action" shots.

Christian Bale's character is hanging out in a place he shouldn't be, and his mom shows up. To avoid getting in trouble, he jumps out a second story window. Several times.

And she watches him do it. I'm laughing while I'm typing this. I know I'm probably the only person in the world laughing about this movie, but its something you gotta laugh at.

Let's see, what else is new? Oh, I've been practicing a lot. I'm not sure exactly how this music thing is gonna work out, seeing as the only band member left is me.

Yeah, Jerry left. I'm bummed, but I really don't blame him. You can only watch a train wreck for so long before you realize you should look away.

Now I'm kinda down, so I'm gonna get back to practicing. Maybe some recording.

One hundred percent

With a grand total of 350+ hours since october 19th, I have 100% completed fallout new vegas tonight. It is by far the largest game I have ever played.

The only other game I have done that with is the elder scrolls IV:Oblivion. That one took 150 hours.

I tried to do it on fallout 3, but gave up after...I feel like a nerd... 1,000+ hours. Seriously. One thousand hours. Well, recorded hours. I'm pretty sure it was closer to 1,500 to be completely honest.

I understand why I have yet to record a full length album now.

Get used to it

Isn't it weird how things that used to terrify you can become so commonplace? I'm not going to be more specific, because the action to which I refer is legally in a rather gray area.

Still, the action used to terrify me, and now I do it naturally and effortlessly. I'm actually good at it.

Let's get physical

Wow, so its official. I have physical withdrawl symptoms from alcohol now. The last thing I want to do is get out of bed today, but I've got a pretty big day.

I'm leaving now to get my ritalin refilled, and then I have an interview. I'm gonna need the luck of the irish today.

Ugly elvis is a sore loser

Man, I'm at potowatomi with my girlfriend and she is actually wayyyy up. I, on the other hand, am way down.

I came here to teach baby about hot (read the previous post), but baby is hot tonight. Ugly elvis on the other hand...he may be 100% Irish, but the luck of the irish took the night off.

The worst part? I feel like I could win her money back three fold. Still. Maybe the internal/external stimulant barrier has been broken. Maybe hell has frozen over. Who knows.

I wanted to teach the love of my life to be a better person, but she taught me YET ANOTHER lesson. Great. Apparently I have nothing to contribute to anybody ever.

At least I still know my way around six strings =)

Back to the money pits

We're going back to the casino. My better half has a problem with cash. It burns holes in her pockets.

Despite my best attempts, that money is gonna hit the floor one way or another. Do I fight her now and be the bad guy for holding her back, or go through with it and be the bad guy for not making her leave while she's up?

It's a difficult choice, but I know that when I put my mind to it, no one can talk that bottle out of my hand.

When I was 2, I saw a candle. My mom let me touch it, and I learned what hot is. I stopped touching candles after that.

I guess, sometimes, you gotta let baby touch the candle.

The next show is gonna be sweet!

I was just donated some sweet lighting effects for the next upcoming show, and I'm psyched. I think it's gonna be sweet.

I'm gonna play acoustic, but don't let the lack of a band fool you, this is gonna be the best show I've ever played. The set is gonna be the longest I've ever played, but its not gonna exceed 30-35 minutes. It will comprise of the best of my new songs with the best of our old songs.

Sweet! Happy new years boys and girls!

Happy New Years!

Happy new years to everyone and anyone reading this. From the ugly elvis to your computer screen, I hope 2011 is better for you than 2010.

If 2010 was great, then just sit down and shut up and let 2011 wrap its awesomeness around you. If 2010 sucked, welcome to the club. I personally don't have to do much to make this year better, last year was turrible. Cleveland brown says its turrible, and I agree.

Turrible.